INDIANA – Many parents resort to tactics that may not be as effective as they hope during the holiday season, according to a new poll from the University of Michigan Health C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital. The National Poll on Children’s Health found that one-quarter of parents with children ages 3 to 5 have threatened to withhold Santa Claus visits or gifts to encourage better behavior.
Alongside the Santa threat, many parents reported using other methods, such as threatening to leave holiday activities, taking away toys, or denying dessert to get their children to behave. However, experts caution that these tactics may not be the most effective in the long run.
Dr. Susan Woolford, a pediatrician at Mott Children’s Hospital, explained that discipline is essential for helping children learn appropriate behaviors and understand the difference between right and wrong. However, she warned that empty threats undermine trust and are often ineffective.
“Positive reinforcement and consistent discipline are more likely to shape long-term behavior,” Dr. Woolford said in a hospital news release. “Empty threats are not usually effective and can harm the parent-child relationship.”
The poll, which surveyed 725 parents of children between the ages of 1 and 5, revealed that half of parents rated themselves as very consistent in their disciplinary strategies. Despite this, nearly a quarter of parents admitted to reacting impulsively, feeling too tired to remain consistent, or getting overly frustrated with their child’s behavior.
“It’s important for parents to plan ahead and ensure they’re on the same page with discipline strategies,” Dr. Woolford emphasized. “This helps provide a clear foundation for understanding expectations and avoiding mixed signals about boundaries.”
Despite their efforts, many parents remain unsure of the effectiveness of their approaches. Three out of five parents said their discipline strategies were somewhat effective, while only two in five felt their methods were very effective.
The poll also found that while most parents seek advice from various sources, including the other parent, family, friends, and parenting books, fewer than a fifth have discussed discipline with a pediatrician. Some parents even admitted to using discipline strategies that experts do not recommend, with two in five parents acknowledging they sometimes spank their children.
Research has shown that spanking can lead to increased aggression and defiance in children, prompting Dr. Woolford to caution against relying on strategies that might produce short-term compliance but negative long-term effects.
For children ages 1 to 2, distraction and redirection are often the most effective strategies, as they are still exploring their environment and are less likely to misbehave purposefully. As children approach age 3, however, they begin to test boundaries more often, and parents may find themselves using warnings, firm communication, and timeouts.
Dr. Woolford noted that preschool-aged children respond best to discipline strategies emphasizing logical consequences. For instance, if a child spills a drink out of anger, having them clean it up is a more practical approach than an unrelated punishment.
She added that consequences should be immediate and related to the misbehavior, helping children connect their actions to the results. However, parents must remain flexible as children’s responses to discipline will evolve.
“Balancing correction with positive reinforcement, such as praise and rewards, helps children build self-esteem while learning from their mistakes,” Dr. Woolford concluded.
For more information on effective discipline strategies, the American Academy of Pediatrics offers resources for parents.
